Thursday, February 20, 2014

Life after 21

Life after 21 has been same ol same ol....not completely back to old eating ways but certainly not as disciplined as the challenge. I'm fighting to make this lifestyle change for the better but having resistance doesn't make it easy. You need that support system and partner in crime so to speak to help with the struggles and the successes. I find it very difficult to plan and prepare meals because I’m the only one who really wants this life style and so I am running out of ideas and motivation. I can only cook chicken breast so many ways ha ha. I really think getting the cook book that goes with the challenge would be a great gift (in case you needed ideas for me lol). I think meal planning needs to become a priority and I need to not worry so much about other people’s input and just cook what I cook and whoever eat will eat. I want my daughter (currently 5) to stop asking if we can "go out" to eat, I was it to be a given that we will be home eating in the evening. So I have been looking into seeing a nutritionist because my insurance will cover it and I could definitely use the education, I mean this is an appointment id make so I would HAVE to make time to do it.

As you can tell I suck at this whole blogging thing. Life gets away from me and I am either frantically trying to get things done so I can go to bed knowing I’ll be waking up every couple hours that I forget to stop and make time for myself. We forget how important making time for you is. I have forever been so focused on making those around me happy that I rarely think of myself and I mean never. So doing the challenge was the first thing I had done for myself in a long time. For those of you mommas that find time to work full time jobs, this includes you stay at home Mommies also and carve out time for you in that busy day is a miracle and I’d like to know your secrets. For me my dream would be to let go of my guilt enough to find some time to work out again, I have always craved activity and these days it just seems like there are not enough hours in the day for it all. I feel guilty if I spend the few precious hours in the evening away from my kids because I'm gone all day so those hours are golden to me. Then waking up an extra hour early although I could do it seems impossible and silly at this point with getting an average of oh I don't know say 3-4 hours a sleep a night. This alone is killing me and I know it is only temporary but it is a struggle none the less.

I have goals and dreams and I think I am more sentimental now because I have been watching One Tree Hill again these past few weeks and let me tell you is sure makes me miss the "good old days" you know the high school and college ones where you see and talk to your childhood friends every single day. You play sports and involve yourself in activities galore. All the time in the world for you. You hold hands and show PDA without a second thought.(I am a sucker for a good love story...real or fake and yes I do watch the Bachelor haha). I have thought a lot about who I was in high school wishing I was more outgoing and friendly....missing those I spent my time with and those were mostly seasonal friends as I switched from sport to sport. I never really belonged to a group and guilty for the ones I treated poorly even if it was one time or just plain rude because I wanted to be. I have sense because a quiet reserved person uncomfortable in large groups and so thankful for my hubby who can do the talking for us. Staying home is my specialty :) I sure am thankful for a group I am included in on facebook because I am more talkative and participate in conversation way more than I ever would before, probably because we all have common interest and I feel comfortable with most of the members.

I had coffee with an old classmate a few weeks back and it just made me wish that stuff happened more often. I have to thank her for asking me to join her because it was great. Something I would have never done myself but glad she did. It makes me want to ask others out to catch up to see how life is. Anyway, duty calls but I wanted to start something a little different after each blog post Ill end it with my future goals. When I come back to write again I will update you on those goals and see how I do following through

so here it goes

Goals:

make more time for me in day. read a book, go for a walk, sit in a quiet room and relax.
clean out my closet (this is seriously a huge problem)

until next time my friends....